How to respond in the midst of conflict

This past Sunday we continued our series "But Why?" This entire series we are going to look at the Why behind the What at WFC!!! We will break down our vision of Faith, Family & Fun. You can listen to the podcast at http://www.wyandottefamily.com/listen.html or you can download it from iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/wyandotte-family-church/id478735158  

Conflict is everywhere, in every relationship and exists on every continent. Wherever you find people you will find conflict...even in the "church family." So, knowing conflict is coming and will continue to come, how should we respond?

If you are not interested in growing through conflict and are not open to change at this current moment that you probably do not want to keep reading this blog. Just stop and come back in a later time. But those of you who are ready for something different. Those of you who are ready to see better results from conflict and stronger relationships, keep reading.

Ephesians 4:2--Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowances for reach other's faults because of your love. Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. For there is one body and one Spirit...

These short couple of verses have so much meat we could chew on this for weeks and months. The first response to conflict is to be humble. Humility in conflict simply means acknowledging our role in the matter or issue. So many times all we can see is what the other person has done. As bad as it may be, we have played a part in it as well. The second response is to be gentle. Why would we be gentle? Because we care about the other person. The goal of conflict is to restore communication and the relationship not prove we are right. I don't know about you but I could stop now and pray for the next year for myself to be humble and gentle.

It goes on to say be patient with each other, making allowances for each others faults because of your love. Making allowances for each others faults doesn't mean we position ourselves to get hurt over and over again, it simply means we recognize that the other person is human like us. They will mistreat, misunderstand, disappoint, forget and even at times say wrong things, just like us. Verse 2 is strongly connected to verse 3.

Make every effort to keep yourselves unified in the Spirit. When we make allowances for each others faults, we don't run from conflict but we pursue peace. We don't give up on others and write them off, we commit to working through it, growing through it, praying through it, talking through it and loving through it. When we make allowances for each others faults, peace and unity are our chief goals.

It is my prayer that all us take a step toward handling conflict the way God calls us to. I pray that churches become stronger as the "church family" makes a pre-choice choice to deal with conflict instead of running away hurt and offended. I can't wait to see the "body of Christ" (spiritual family) shine like never before in the coming days as we handle conflict better.

Is Church for Church people?

This past Sunday we KICKED OFF our new series "But Why?" This entire series we are going to look at the Why behind the What at WFC!!! We will break down our vision of Faith, Family & Fun. You can listen to the podcast at http://www.wyandottefamily.com/listen.html or you can download it from iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/wyandotte-family-church/id478735158  

So, is church for church people? What is the church for? What is the purpose of the church? Why did Jesus establish the church? When is the first time the word church is mentioned in the Bible? These are all great questions.

If you listen to the podcast from this past Sunday you will learn where the word "church" is first mentioned in the New Testament, the context of which is was mentioned and what that means to us today. I pray it is as life changing for you as it was for me!

Should church be a place non-religious people can connect to? Should church be a place only for the religious?

Right before Jesus died on the cross we get a glimpse into His heart in John 17. We can glean several things from Jesus' prayer. He prays for his followers (ek-klā-sē'-ä ). He does pray several things but I want to hone in on one of them for the purpose of this blog.

John 17:18-Just as you sent me into the world, I am sending them into the world.

Jesus prayed that His followers would be a sent group on mission. Just as He left heaven and entered our world, we are called and commissioned to do the same The church was originally a movement with a message not a meeting place. It was a group of people who gathered together as one, with a singular vision and mission, "To spread the truth and grace of Jesus Christ to ALL PEOPLE." It was the mission that brought them together.

Looking at the Gospels, how Jesus taught and lived, He would expect the non-religious, hurting, skeptical, struggling and broken to be in our churches. Why? Because that is who Jesus called us to love, serve and reach. The prerequisite to being a part of the church is being a sinner. Jesus Himself said, "He didn't come to save those who think they are righteous but those who know they are sinners."

Who can you reach this week? Who can you serve? Who can you encourage? Who can you listen to? Who can you pray with? Who can you spend time with? Who can you invite to church? Let's be a people who are focused on the mission not tradition.

How to pray truly effective prayers!

We continued our series this past Sunday "Stories" With special guests "Life Challenge" from Detroit. 4 students shared how their life hit rock bottom due to drugs and alcohol but now they have been transformed by the power and grace of Jesus Christ!!! You can listen to the podcast at http://www.wyandottefamily.com/listen.html or you can download it from iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/wyandotte-family-church/id478735158  

This next Sunday we'll be having some college students from the University of Michigan and Matthew & Julie Payne from Chi Alpha.

There is a very short verse found in 1 John 5 that is extremely powerful. This one verse has the potential to breathe fresh life, vigor and expectation in your relationship with Jesus. This one verse has the potential to change your view of your job, family, friends and circle of influence. Let's check it out and see what it says..

1 John 5:14-And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him.

There are many other verses in the New Testament that talk about asking according to God's will. There is nothing more powerful and effective then praying the very heart of God and will of God.

We know that Jesus came into our world and gave His life so that none should die but all come to repentance. We know Jesus said that He came to seek and save that which was lost. We know that Jesus said it is not the healthy that need a doctor but the sick. We know that the Bible says that God so loved the world that whosoever believes in Him will not die but have eternal life.

God's heart is for your friends. God's heart is for your family. God's heart is for your co-workers. God is for that person in your life who you think is hopeless and too far from God. Jesus gave his life so they had an opportunity to find hope, life and grace in Jesus Christ.

That is why it is so important that we pray for those who are in our sphere of influence that have not crossed the line into a relationship with Jesus. When we pray this prayer, we are praying and asking for something that pleases God. We are praying according to His will.

That is why during this series Stories we are encouraging you to bring a friend or two. That is why we are challenging you to pray for them throughout the week. Praying the heart of God and the will of God is the most effective prayer you could ever pray. God wants to use you to make a difference in others lives. You can start right now. You can start this week! Pray big and watch God answer your prayers!

Easter Sunday is only about one month away. As we approach a Sunday where many people are willing to come to church, I encourage you to start praying today for the people in your sphere of influence. Start praying for open doors and opportunities for you to talk and invite others Start praying for God to challenge your heart and expand His love in your life.

Ps. Don't miss our next "Refresh" Sunday, March 30th 6:30-8:00pm Refresh is an extended time of prayer and worship. It is a great place to learn prayer and experience God's presence..

Bed Time Stories

We continued our series this past Sunday "Stories" With special guests "Life Challenge" from Detroit. 4 students shared how their life hit rock bottom due to drugs and alcohol but now they have been transformed by the power and grace of Jesus Christ!!! You can listen to the podcast at http://www.wyandottefamily.com/listen.html or you can download it from iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/wyandotte-family-church/id478735158  

This next Sunday we'll be having some college students from the University of Michigan and Matthew & Julie Payne from Chi Alpha.

How many of you remember being told bed time stories growing up? Maybe it was your grandma or grandma. Maybe it was your mom or dad. Maybe it was an aunt, uncle or cousin. Regardless, growing up as kids we loved to hear stories read to us or told to us.

Now that we all are mature adults, nothing has really changed. No we may not be told bed time stories but nothing speaks to the core of our hearts like stories. That is why we love watching the based on a real life story movie. That is why we love the ABC or NBC specials. That is why many woman love to watch Lifetime or behind the scene stories. Nothing speaks more to us than a powerful and meaningful story.

Most people don't realize that the Bible is one story. There are two parts to it; Old Testament and New Testament. There are 66 books but one central main character. One person that is the center of it all, Jesus Christ.

When we cross the line into a relationship with Jesus, we become a part of a GREATER STORY. We become part of a story that includes millions of characters and that is still unfolding. We become a part of the story of God!

If you have never taken time to think through and write out your story, I encourage you to join one of our weekly home groups for the remaining 6 weeks. People will be taking time to work on their stories and then share them with the group. What a safe place to practice and take a growth step.

PS. Our next water baptism is Sunday, March 30th. We are excited to celebrate more stories and peoples lives that have been transformed by the love and grace of Jesus Christ.

Solid Foundation part 4 & 5

We concluded our series this past Sunday "40 Days in the Word" with part 6" How do I Integrate the Bible into my daily life?" You can listen to the podcast at http://www.wyandottefamily.com/listen.html or you can download it from iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/wyandotte-family-church/id478735158  
We talked about on Sunday the importance of Building our lives on the Word of God. That is the first step in integrating the Bible into our lives. So for I have blogged the 2^nd step which is living the Word of God and the 3^rd step which is growing through the Word of God. Let’s take a look at the 4^th & 5th steps of integrating God's Word into our daily lives.

#4—I’ve got to act on it.

One of the verses we memorized during the 40 Days in the Word series was James 1:22.  “Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves.  Do what it says.” 

If I go to church and it’s going in one ear and out the other and I listen to it, I’m living a life of self-deception.  I think because I’ve written notes down I’ve got it.  No.  I don’t have it.  I only believe the part of the Bible I actually do.  We’ve spent six weeks in the home groups teaching you how to write personal application, how to personalize it and paraphrase it and probe it and pronounce it.  All those ways we talked about in our home groups.  

When we take a growth step and put God’s Word into action, we discover and encounter God in ways we never have before. We get to experience God in ways others don’t or others can’t understand. Why? Because we have put into practice and acted on what God has said. I think about Peter walking on water. I think about the little boy giving Jesus his little lunch. I think about the blind man throwing off his robe and running toward Jesus. Never underestimate one simple act of obedience. Apply God’s Word to your daily life isn’t easy but it is worth it. We get to know God and experience a level of relationship with Him the way we were created to.

Finally there is a 5^th step.

 
#5—I must trust in it. 

I build on it, I feed on it, I live by it, I grow through it, I act on it, and I then live it out by trusting in it. 

 
Why can I trust the Bible?  We did a whole session on that.  God is never going to guide you in the wrong direction.  Other people will.  Even well-meaning people.  I’ve had dear friends give me advice, and it was the wrong advice.  You’ve had friends who love you deeply and gave you advice but it was the wrong advice.  Even well-meaning people often will steer you in the wrong way.  But God will never do that.  You can always trust him.  If he tells you to go that way, you’d better go that way!  Because it’s always going to be the right way.  It’s going to be the best way.  It’s going to cause a whole lot less problems if you trust and follow.

Psalm 119:105 was one of our memory verses during this series; “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.”  

I call this the flashlight verse of the Bible.  Your word is a lamp for my feet.  It’s like flashlight.  Showing me so I don’t stub my toe at night, and a light for my path.

Are you ever in the dark?  Yeah, all the time.  Some of you are going, “I don’t have the slightest idea of what I’m supposed to do about this relationship I’m in right now…  I haven’t the slightest idea whether I should accept this job offer… I haven’t the slightest idea where I should invest next … What I should do with the next five years of my life. I am clueless right now what to do with my children.”

What do you do when you’re in the dark?  You flip on the light.  This is why memorizing this verse is so important.  This verse is a promise from God.  The next time you’re in the dark and you’re confused and you don’t know which way to turn and you don’t know what to do and where to go you just say, “God, you’ve said in Psalm 119:105 ‘Your word is a light to my feet and a lamp for my path.’  God, keep your promise.  I’m going to start reading your word.  Show me what you want me to do.” 

If you go to the Word and you say, “Lord, I’m trusting that your Word will be a lamp to my feet and a light for my path, in other words you’re going to show me the path to walk on, you’re going to lead me in the dark.  When I’m confused and I don’t know what to do about this relationship, but you promised and I am going to trust in your Word,” you will see amazing things happen.

Here’s what I want to challenge you to do.  I want to challenge you to make a commitment to keep on doing what you’ve been doing – not to stop.  I want to challenge you to keep on being in a home group and I want to challenge you to keep on reading the Bible every day, having a daily quiet time, a daily devotion.

If you want to change groups and get a new one, that’s fine.  If you want to start a whole new group, that’s fine.  But keep the habit of a group study and keep the habit of personal study so that you can become a man of the Word or a woman of the Word.  Let me pray for you as we conclude this blog series and the 40 Days in the Word series.

Prayer:

       Father, I want to thank you for the Word of God.  I thank you that it calms our fears.  It enlightens our mind.  It strengthens our will.  It grows our maturity.  I thank you, Lord, that it calms our worries and it leads us in the dark.  All the things that your Word does we want to commit to being a part of an ongoing process of continuing in your word. Father God, so many good things have been happening the past 40 Days. So many great stories of people finding hope, courage and renewed passion in your Word. I pray that you give us the grace and strength to continue on. I pray that we will not quit with the end of the this series but that this will be a life-long healthy life giving habit. We love you and thank you for teaching us and guiding us. In Jesus Name! AMEN!

 

Adapted from thoughts form Rick Warren and the 40 Days in the Word Campaign.

 

PS. This Sunday is the KICKOFF of our NEW series “Stories.” Come and hear Jeff Hlavin share from “Hippy to Happy.” We’ll also be debuting a NEW video story each week from someone in the WFC family.

Solid Foundatin Park 3

We concluded our series this past Sunday "40 Days in the Word" with part 6" How do I Integrate the Bible into my daily life?" You can listen to the podcast at http://www.wyandottefamily.com/listen.html or you can download it from iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/wyandotte-family-church/id478735158  

We talked about on Sunday the importance of Building our lives on the Word of God. That is the first step in integrating the Bible into our lives. Yesterday’s blog was the 2^nd step which is living the Word of God. Let’s take a look at the third step.

#3—I grow through it.

I mentioned a couple weeks ago that the Bible is often referred to as a seed.  It’s planted in our hearts.  When the truth is planted our hearts, if it finds good soil, it grows and it produces fruit.  Remember, no root, no fruit.  God wants you to be fruitful in your life.  In order to have that you’ve got to have an open heart.  You’ve got to have a receptive heart.  You’ve got to have good soil in your life. 

The fourth verse that we looked at that we memorized earlier this month is Psalms 119:18 “Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in your law.”

There are lots of wonderful things in the Bible but we can’t see them unless God opens our eyes.  Circle, underline or highlight the word “open” in Psalm 119:18.  Open means being receptive.  I’ve got to be open to the Word of God.  So if I’m going to become a woman of the Word or a man of the Word I’ve got to be open to it.  That means even when we don’t like it, we are open to it. 

Jesus told a whole story about this.  It’s in Luke 8 it’s called the parable of the sower or soils.  He says, a famer goes out and sows seed and it falls on four different kinds of soil and it gets four different kinds of results.  This represents four different attitudes that you can have toward the Bible.

I used to think that the four soils represent four different kinds of people.  They don’t.  They represent our attitudes (condition of our hearts) and on the same day I can have all four attitudes.  

1. The first is the hardened soil. 

The hardened soil represents a closed mind.  The hardened soil in this story represents a closed mind.  Sometimes we don’t even give God a chance to talk to us.  Our minds are made up, our hearts are hardened.  We’re not willing to listen.  I don’t want to hear what God has to say about my boyfriend.  I like my boyfriend.  So I don’t want to hear what God has to say.  I don’t want to hear what God has to say about my debt.  I don’t want to hear what God has to say about sex.  I don’t want to hear what God has to say about this or that because I’ve already got my mind made up. 

That is a closed mind.  And a narrow footpath is narrow and it’s hardened.  Some people are simply not open to what God has to say.  Their hearts are hardened to His Word and reality.

So the first action to growing through it is I must cultivate an open mind.  If I’m going to let God’s truth really change my life I have to be open to it.  I have to cultivate an open mind.

 

2. Then Jesus said the second kind of soil that the farmer throws seed on is the shallow soil. 

That represents the superficial mind.  Sometimes we react superficially to the Bible.  We go to church and say that was a good sermon.  I really liked that   That was good.  But we’ve forgotten it by the time we get to the parking lot.  We get excited, we react emotionally, we’re moved impulsively.  But we don’t really let it take the time to sink in.  It never really penetrates the bedrock of our personality.

So what is the action step if I don’t want to be superficial?  And I know you don’t.  You don’t want to be a superficial man.  You don’t want to be a superficial woman.  How do I have some depth in my life?  How do I get some roots in my life?  How do I get some spiritual maturity in my life? Here’s the second action step: I must make time for God’s Word. 

If I just do a quick little glance at it, I glance at it, I don’t gaze it, I don’t give it any time, then I can’t build any roots.  Roots take time to develop.  No roots, no fruits.  Busyness is a major barrier that keeps us from being a man of the Word or a woman of the Word.

3. A third soil is a soil with weeds. 

The soil with weeds represents a preoccupied mind.  In other words the seed God gives is the truth and he plants it in my mind and my heart and I go, yeah ok! And I let it sit there and it starts growing.  But then I let other things choke it out of my life – worry and busyness and money and job and all these other things.  And the weeds choke it out and I get preoccupied and I can’t really do anything with it.  All the circuits are busy in my life.  And that’s why I can’t hear God.

What’s the action step?  I must eliminate the distractions.  I must eliminate the distractions in my life. What things distract you from connecting with God in His Word?

4. Then finally Jesus says there’s a fourth kind; good soil. A willing mind.

A willing mind says, God, I’m willing to learn.  I’m teachable.  I’m humble.  I don’t think I know it all, so God, teach me.  The action step is to cooperate with what God says. 
 

That means, “God I don’t understand it all, but I’m going to trust you. I am going to cooperate.”

When our heart/attitude has good soil we find ourselves growing through it. We find ourselves changing simply because we are allowing God to change us on the inside.

What do you do if you don't have this kind of soil right now in your heart? Talk to God about it. Be honest. Share with you where you are at but pray and ask Him to lead you to where He wants you to be. Pray for a soft heart and willing mind. That is a great prayer to pray every morning before the day starts :)

 
 

Adapted from thoughts form Rick Warren and the 40 Days in the Word Campaign.

PS. This Sunday is the KICKOFF of our NEW series “Stories.” Come and hear Jeff Hlavin share from “Hippy to Happy.” We’ll also be debuting a NEW video story each week from someone in the WFC family.

Solid Foundation part 2

We concluded our series this past Sunday "40 Days in the Word" with part 6" How do I Integrate the Bible into my daily life?" You can listen to the podcast at http://www.wyandottefamily.com/listen.html or you can download it from iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/wyandotte-family-church/id478735158  

We talked about on Sunday the importance of Building our lives on the Word of God. That is the first step in integrating the Bible into our lives. Let’s take a look at the second step.

#2--Live by the Word of God.

The Word of God (Bible) is not only food for your soul, the Word of God is your standard of living.  It is the Word of God that sets the standard by which you judge everything else of value in your life.  It’s the standard by which you make decisions for the things you are facing in life.  We build our lives on something.  We base those decisions on something.  It comes when we allow the Word of God to become the standard by which we live by. 

The Bible says in Psalm 1:1-2, Oh, the joys (other translations say “Blessed are”) of those who do not follow the advice of the wicked, or stand around with sinners, or join in with mockers. ² But they delight in the law of the Lord, meditating on it day and night.

What does that mean?  It means if you want your life to be blessed you don’t build your life on the counsel of the world, on the way the world thinks. But you meditate, you build your life on the way that God thinks. It means we find out what God has to say and His reality before we act or make a decision. We thing, mediate and trust His ways.

The counsel of the ungodly, that’s the stuff we hear all the time – on television, in movies, in print, and in media.  It’s the talk that goes on around the world around us.  It’s the values of the world. It is extremely popular! And the Bible says if you want your life to be blessed you don’t build your life, you don’t live your life by that kind of counsel; but live your life, build your life, feed your life, on the Word of God.  

It’s the Word of God that will give you hope when you’re in crisis.  It’s the Word of God that will give you comfort when you are in despair.  It’s the Word of God that will give you strength when you are weak.  It’s the Word of God that will give you wisdom when you’re confused.  It’s the Word of God that will give you guidance when you’re looking for direction.  And it’s the Word of God that will give you strength to resist when you face temptation. These are all things we will have to walk through in our lives.

Psalm 119:11 says “I’ve hidden your word in my heart so that I might not sin against you.”  He says this is the reason I’ve hidden your word in my heart.  This is what memorizing the Bible is about.  It’s about hiding it.  Taking it into my heart.  He says I’ve hidden your word in my heart not so I can just be Super Christian.  But it’s so I will not sin against you. So I can live in such a way that honors You. 

Remember in Matthew 4 when Jesus was tempted? There were three times the devil came and tempted him.  And all three times Jesus only used one weapon to defend himself.  He said “It’s written…”  When the devil would tempt him again he says, “Yeah, but it’s written.”  It is written.”  It is the only weapon he used to defend himself.

If you have the desire to follow Jesus and be like Jesus, then we learn from how He defended Himself. Even Jesus used the weapon of Scripture to fight temptation.

So often, when we most need the Bible is when we don’t have a Bible with us, when we’re talking to a friend who’s in trouble, or when we’re tempted by something or someone.  We don’t have our Bible with us.  That’s why we have to hide the Word of God in our hearts.  God will bring the word back to our minds.  But he can’t bring it back to our minds if we haven’t hidden it in our hearts yet.  He’ll bring the word back to your mind for yourself, for what you’re facing.  And he’ll bring it back to your mind for what some friend of yours is facing, some challenge that they’re up against.  You can say, but here’s what God’s Word says.  And the verse that you’ve memorized will come back to you.  And you’ll be able to share that to help them as they build their life.  To help them in their walk with Jesus Christ. 

That’s why God wants us to remember the Word with our hearts, to put it in, to memorize it, and then to let that be the standard by which we live our lives.  By which we build our lives and fight the good fight of faith.

It is very much like the process of making tea. Coffee is more popular here Downriver Detroit but many still like to drink tea. Once you have hot water you but the tea bag in your mug. As it seeps, the water absorbs the color and the flavor and the aroma and the character of the tea. But something else happens to the water.  It takes on a whole new identity.  Because we no longer call it a glass of water.  We now call it a glass of tea. 

When you let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly you absorb the nature of Christ, the flavor and the aroma of Christ.  But something else happens to you.  You take on a whole new identity and you begin to become the man or the woman of God that he has always wanted you to become.  You begin to become the man or woman of God that you have always wanted to be when you let the word of Christ dwell in you richly.  Not only do you know what the Word of God says, you begin to become more and more like the author. 

As we build out lives on the Bible and begin to follow through and live the Bible we find ourselves become stronger and stronger. We find ourselves building our lives on the rock!! In a world that is unstable and constantly changing, we can be standing strong!!!

 

Adapted from thoughts from Rick Warren and 40 Days in the Word Campaign

PS. This Sunday we launch our new series “STORIES.” It is going to be a fun, inspiring and motivation month as we hear many peoples stories from our church and from around the state.